Dear Lane Bryant...

Santa's good.

Two days before Christmas, I received an email from Lane Bryant heralding their day after Christmas sale. Bras and jeans on sale. I made a mental note because, really, when bras are 'buy 2 get 2' I'm all over it.

Lo and behold on Christmas Day, what does little Reesie get? Gift card to Lane Bryant. Well played, Santa!

So, off to Burbank I go the day after Christmas. I know, I know. Crazy Reesie out with the other crazies at the maul mall. I got into Lane Bryant by 8 o'clock that morning. I was out of the mall parking lot by 9:15 a.m.

I was the lone crazy person shopper in the store. Kid in the candy store, money burning a hole in my pocket, I looked around, wide-eyed at all that lay before me inside Lane Bryant. Like the responsible adult I am, I tell the girl I need bras and jeans for sure and maybe something fun if there's enough leftover.

I get measured. I try on. I select. I set aside. Moving to the wall of jeans, the gal asks my size. "4 yellow tall" [Lane Bryant has this 'Right Fit' way of measuring for jeans based on your shape]. "Oh, we don't carry talls in stores anymore."

You don't carry talls in stores anymore?! Huh? Wha?

"How am I supposed to get jeans?"
"Just go online and order!" She was a bit too cheery about this.
"How will I know if the jeans are long enough?"
"You can return the jeans to the store if they don't fit."
"So...I have to BUY jeans, WAIT 4-8 business days to get them, then TRY THEM ON?"
"Yes!"
"No!"

I have to buy jeans that may or may not fit, wait for them to arrive, then return if they don't. That just doesn't seem right. And, I tell the girl. Sorry for her. Why can't I go into the store and try them on, ensure they fit, then purchase? I was livid. The sales gal had me try on 'average' size jeans "for the fit" and then guessed how long the talls would be. Ai yi yi! A lot of stores increase the rise of the jeans and call them tall. Uh, my legs are long. I need length!

Later that night, I found Lane Bryant on Twitter (@lanebryant). Dear @lanebryant, Why did you take tall jeans and pants out of your stores?! I got a DM (direct message) saying all I had to do was order online.

Dear @lanebryant, I have to BUY jeans that may or may not fit?
Yes, then return if they don't fit you. Thanks!

Are you kidding me?! What a tremendous pain! These messages went on for 3 or 4 more rounds, each with a line that has nothing to do with anything, really - have them shipped to the store! There is no demand for talls! You can easily return to a store!

I have to spend money in hopes that the jeans fit? I've shopped like that for most of my life! Many is the number of times I've been tremendously disappointed when something I adored in a catalog didn't fit. It's frustrating. It's disappointing. And it pisses me off!

NOW where am I going to find tall jeans?

*sigh*

Food Review ~ The Bazaar

It's no secret I like to eat. Dare I call myself a 'foodie'? Well...okay!

I traipse over the hill to meet friends at The Bazaar, a dark bar/restaurant/hip spot in the SLS Hotel on La Cienega. The bar looked cool - all dark with its tall glass-topped tables and cushy bar stools. That's really all I saw as we were immediately whisked off to our table.

We were seated in the dark dining room with a view of the bright white, well-lit kitchen. The room was bustling, movement of all sorts going on; mainly waiters dashing about carrying plates of delicious looking food. Our waiter - young and adorable - greeted us and recited his spiel like a seasoned server should. He explained the tapas menu then took our drink order. "Three 'Winter Wonderland' drinks please."

Winter Wonderland is one hell of a drink. I could write an entire post about this drink alone. An entire post! But, I won't.

So, over to our table comes young and adorable waiter #2 pushing a cart. For a minute there I thought were were getting table-side guacamole service. Nope. It's table-side drink service - even better!

This is what I remember of the Winter Wonderland - delicious, crushed nuts, liquid nitrogen and a lot of alcohol. Oh, yes, the drink is made with liquid nitrogen. It's scooped into a glass and served with a spoon. I know! Ohh, it's so yummy.

Then, there's the food. Oh, the food! Here's what we had:

• Sweet potato chips with yogurt sauce - not sure who started the whole sweet potato chips/fries thing, but, thank you whoever you are.
• Green asparagus tempura - these things were huge. Huge! I can't even...I mean...they're like...like...Oh! They are the size of those jumbo pencils at Disneyland or Knott's Berry Farm. You know what I'm talking about. THAT was the size of the asparagus. Fact.
• Endive with goat cheese - for me, if the description reads "...with goat cheese..." I'm IN. The goat cheese had a light and lovely citrusy flavor to it; perfect pairing with the endive.
• Beef hanger steak - much too rare for me, though I'm sure it was tasty.
• Tortilla de patatas "new way" - this was very interesting...potato foam/soup + egg 63 *in an egg shell*! Clever. Yummy.
• Jicama-wrapped guacamole - Oh. My! Tissue paper-thin jicama slices filled with guacamole. Ohh, yes. Simple. Very very good. I would eat that plus the little sandwiches and be perfectly happy.
• Philly cheesesteak - these little air pockets of bread filled with beef and melted cheddar. It's no Geno's or Jim's or Pat's. These little sandwiches stand on their own as far as cheesesteaks go. The vegetarian version (Hilly cheesesteak) has mushrooms instead of beef. These are ordered per person. Do yourself a favor and order at least two. You're welcome.

Somewhere in between I ordered my second drink - Hendrick's gin and tonic. Not too exciting except for the ice ball. The perfectly shaped ice ball kept my drink cold through the rest of dinner and into dessert and it kept me fascinated.

After dinner, we were escorted to the Patisserie for dessert. The dessert bar had a fantastic selection of bons bons, cookies, candy (chocolate covered Pop Rocks anyone?), cakes and assorted pastries. I had a lovely, light green tea cookie and an absolutely delicious eyes rolled into the back of my head chocolate coffee bon bon.

The Bazaar is a wonderful food and drink experience. The sights, the sounds, the tastes all add up to something good. Bring friends and plenty of cash.

The Bazaar
at SLS Hotel
Reservations: 310.246.5555