Journal in a Jar - 01.15.10

Write about some of the places you went with your father.

Dad used to take me to the San Bernardino Civic Light Opera for musicals. It's one of my fondest memories because it was just the two of us. The night before the matinee, Mom would roll my hair in those pink plastic curlers. Remember those? Hard plastic with the spongey middle to wrap your hair around. Oh how I hated sleeping in those things! Inevitably, 3 or 4 would fall out, leaving me with imperfect curls. Dad would take me to Sir George's or the railroad car restaurant that used to be on Magnolia and Arlington in Riverside. Then off to the show.

The first show I recall in great detail is Godspell. John the Baptist stood in the aisle right next to me, blew his horn three times and proclaimed "Prepare ye the way of the Lord!" I was spellbound; completely fascinated by the music and the actors and the spectacle of a live show. I'm pretty sure I didn't understand what was happening - until the end when they 'crucify' Jesus by tying him to the fence. I still shiver at that (Oh God, I'm dying).

Another warm and wonderful memory is Sunday afternoons at Fiesta Village in Colton. Dad would take me and Yancy...we would play video games after a round of miniature golf, then race to the trampolines or batting cages. This was before Fiesta Village added the water slide. There were bumper boats at one point, I think. Jumping on the trampolines was my absolute favorite ~ free and flying for a brief moment. Absolute joy is what I'm feeling then and now.

One last memory...oh so long ago a road ran parallel to Ontario Airport. The area was unincorporated, no stop signs or signals and fairly dark. This road had a huge dip. I loved riding in Dad's '66 Mustang, speeding along, approaching this dip in the road and yelling "Coast it, Daddy! Coast it!" He would say he was coasting down the dip; who knows if he did or not. But the speed, the slight element of (10 year old perceived) danger and giggling always made me beg him to turn around and do it again.

I'm going to call my Dad today and thank him.

Journal in a Jar

Celia over at The Girl From Mars started her Journal in a Jar writings at the beginning of the year. I asked her about it ~ it's a wonderful gift as well as a brilliant idea. She gave up her 'connection' and I got me a Journal in a Jar!

The jar contains 200+ questions to use as journal topics/writing prompts. I'm excited to start this...relive some memories, kick my writing into gear. I've already started writing in my journal; will start posting here tomorrow.

Many thanks to Tami for the jar and to Celia for sharing :)

What Have I Done? What Have I Done?!

I signed up for the Short Story Challenge - that's what I done.

Tomorrow night, I will receive a link to my writing assignment - a genre and a subject (such as horror and family reunion). I will then have eight days to write a 2,500 word short story. Eek!

After submitting my story, a panel of judges will read & review and choose winners of Round I. Those winners will then receive another link to a genre and subject. The kicker? Twenty-four hours to write a story. Eek! 24 hours. That's not a whole lotta time.

The winners get cash and prizes. And, that's always good. But, I'm looking forward to the reviews and critiques. My story will be available for peer review after judging. I'm hoping they'll all be gentle. Hell, I'm hoping my story will be read period.

The past couple of months, I've developed a few characters. I can't seem to get a story going...perhaps this contest will allow me to use one of these characters rolling 'round my brain...

2,500 words? 8 days? I can do this.

Operation: ClutterCleanUp Day 2

3

randomness...feed your mind and your blog

Name 3 of each:

-Pet Peeves

• poor customer service
• the whole you're/your thing
• stupid drivers

-Close Friends

• Ashley
• Allison
• the Tall Girls

-Favorite Movies

• Rear Window
• the Truman Show
• the Usual Suspects

-Foods You Love

• short ribs
• creme brulee
• french fries

-Favorite Books

• Genuine Lies by Nora Roberts
• Sleeping Beauty series by Anne Rice (A.N. Roquelaure)
• Alex Delaware series by Jonathan Kellerman

-TV Shows You Like

• the West Wing
• Law & Order/Law & Order SVU
• Saved by the Bell

-Celebrities You Like

• George Clooney
• Martin Sheen
• the Animal - Batista

-Favorite Items of Clothing

• jeans
• black cardigan
• blue cashmere scarf

All Is Quiet On New Year's Day (and the day after)

There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself. - Anthony Rapp

That's the goal: fearlessly be myself. The good, the bad, the ugly. I feel like I'm two different people - the outside Rissa who is social and gregarious and fun-loving and on-the-go; and then the inside Rissa who lives within four walls of hoarding, fear, self-loathing and clutter. I want the two to be on the same level.

I can vividly picture a party in my apartment - it's like an open house type of deal...people chatting in the kitchen, music loud, laughing. It's the people I see most clearly. I know exactly who will be here...that's the part I'm striving toward...that's my goal.

I don't know how the hell I am going to get there. But I *have* to get there. And fast.

I'm a Midnight Rambler, baby

I wish I could write.

Sit down, pen to paper (fingers to keyboard, as the case may be), sans prompt and just write.

Write something witty and warm; something biting and sarcastic; something open and real and insightful. Yeah. But I can't. Honestly, I am amazed I made it through three Pamela sessions!

I often sit - like I am now - desperately wanting to write. Somehow, random words or snippets or scenes come to me and I think I could write something with this or about that. Then, I stop to analyze - where did that come from? Where can I take this? Has this been written about before? This is not my beautiful house! Where does this highway go to? Am I right, am I wrong? And I say to myself: My God, what have I done?!

So, I stop. I analyze. I talk myself right out of writing. What is that?! Why is that?!

One hurdle is that I have trouble closing or ending a story. I have pretty good openings. My middles are sometimes muddled and rambling.

Hmm...maybe I should just write openings. That's it! I'll write essay openings and story beginnings, turn a clever phrase or two then let someone else finish what I've started. Yeah, that's the ticket!

My class assignment? To collect those snippets and scenes. Your class assignment? Complete them.

Brilliant!

Writing isn't that hard at all.

Party dress - new year's eve

Consider this if you will:

I certainly am! The ultra-sexy Evalyn dress from b&lu plus-size fashion site. Purrr! $56 minus 25% ~ it's a steal.

Wear with peep-toe stilettos or over-the-knee boots. I'm thinking a chunky boot to throw a curve at ya :)

I have arm issues; I'll have to figure out the bra situation...whatever! I need to rock this on New Year's Eve!

RA RA AH AH AH(men)

I had beef-flavored Cup o'Noodles for lunch today. Sometimes, you just gotta have ramen, y'know? Sitting in my office, I remembered when there was a time if I never saw ramen noodles again, that would be too soon.

In 1993, I was engaged to a not-so-nice guy. While both of us worked, we never seemed to have enough money to cover things other than rent (read: food). There was always enough for his beer; not enough for a jar of peanut butter or loaf of bread. He stocked up on top ramen noodles, Kraft Macaroni & Cheese and cans of tuna. Yes, this is what we lived on for most of the last year we were together.

He would say: Starvation is the mother of invention then prepare some concoction using 2 out of the 3 items above plus whatever condiment packets were around. I got so sick of ramen noodles and Kraft M&C! I swore never to eat that crap again. Even if I only had one dollar left in my pocket, ramen noodles would never pass these lips!

Yeah, well...the best laid plans...

At least now the choice is mine to make.

Riley - 2 Weeks

It's been 2 weeks without Riley. A very rough and tough 2 weeks.

Riley & I moved into this apartment together; this is the first time I've been alone here. Yeah, I expect him to be belly-up at the door when I walk in. Or, his face in the window, meowing when coming home late. I really miss him at night - cold nights in particular because he'd curl up on my feet and I'd be warm.

Had a chuckle last night while reading a magazine. Any time I'd read a book or magazine, Riley would jump onto the bed and stretch across the pages as if to say "If you've got time to read that, you've got time to pay attention to me!" I had a pic on my previous cell phone of Riley's paws wrapped around my Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince book. Too funny looking at that.

Most of his stuff has been cleared out ~ bowls, scratching posts, treats, meds, food, litter. Was caught off-guard when the bathroom door swung all the way back to the wall. Forgot it went that far without a litter box! I did keep a couple of things: his kitty bed, the feather & mouse toy on a stick and a ball of yarn he was unraveling. Sitting at the computer right now, his bed under my feet, I half expect him to start biting my toes...

Almost everyone has asked if I'll get another cat. Right now, my answer is NO. No! No! No! I couldn't go through that again. Told my friend Sarah that I would rather have stuffed animals; have no problem being known as the crazy old stuffed animal lady.

The decision to put him down was the right one. I know it. Doesn't make it easier.