Friday, November 27, 2009

Rant: Smooth Away

I really should not be allowed into Bed Bath & Beyond without supervision.

I hit up Burbank's BB&B to purchase one thing. Shoulda known that was impossible. All I needed was a shower caddy. Found that section and their selection, no problem. Turned around to see a pillar covered in Smooth Away boxes *and* a TV infomercial on endless loop.

Have to admit I've seen the product advertised...and wondered how 'crystals' could make hair removal instant, easy and pain free. Painless isn't exactly a term used with hair removal - whether it's waxing (physically painful) or Nair (painful frustration - and smelly, too!).

I watched the infomercial loop for several minutes, grabbed a box and checked out.

Sucker. I know.

Inside were two different sized rubber 'applicators' and several 'crystal' pads in two different colors. I prepped my skin according to the directions and used the recommended light pink crystal pad on my upper thigh. Clockwise 3 times, counter-clockwise 3 times. Repeat until hair is gone. If that didn't work (it didn't work), instructions said to switch to the dark pink, more coarse, crystal pad.

Clockwise 3 times, counter-clockwise 3 times. Repeat several times. All I got was sloughed off dead skin; not much hair removal. I admit there was some hair removal. Just not sure how it works - is hair removed by the twisting or by removing so much dead skin that the hair falls out?

I'm sticking to my razor.

1 comment:

Lori said...

Don't forget the Epilady. Hurts like an SOB and takes about 10 minutes to remove the hair from a 2-in.-square patch of skin. And then you have to keep doing it to reduce the hair growth over time and eventually kill off the follicles.

I used to use Nair as a young teen, but the night before my freshman year of high school, I scratched my head while I apparently still had a little on my finger, and I ended up with a bald patch about 1/2-inch wide by 1 1/2 inches long on the very top of my head to start out high school. My mom saved the day with a new side part hairstyle for me, but I was paranoid that the wind would blow too hard and everyone would see my bald patch. That was not at all traumatic.

I stopped using Nair and when I tried to use it again years later, my legs were too sensitive to it. The itching drives me crazy and I can't leave it on long enough to actually remove hair.

One day, when I have lots of disposable income, I swear I'm getting electrolysis treatments done and getting rid of it forever.