Grr!

I am livid!

I bust my ass to make a name for myself within the Company. I bite my tongue and put on the appropriate business face when every single fiber of my being is shaking in response to some things going on. I am a damn good employee! And I'm getting passed over, ignored and shafted at every turn; while others (some of whom are not even full-time employees!) are having rules bent to the point of breaking to accomodate situations. What do I have to do?!

I started looking for job opportunities outside of the Company. Yeah, shocked me too.

(This rant was much, much longer with names and everything. After several revisions, this is all I had left. The rage isn't quite as evident...but it is there. Believe me. It is there.)

I feel the earth move under my feet...

5.4 earthquake this morning; centered in Chino Hills CA.

Luckily our building is retro-fitted, allowing it to roll and sway with the earthquake. The sucky thing is that it makes the quake seem much stronger than it truly is.

I'm fine. The family is fine. I'll be on my way home shortly to make sure Riley and my apartment are fine, as well.

An east-coast friend asked "What do you do during an earthquake?" You ride it out and then you freak out.

BTW ~ TwitterVille was ON IT re: earthquake coverage! :)

Thanks for the texts and such asking after me and my family ~ xoxo

~ This is what 5.4 looks like seismologically ~

~ Where it all happened. I'm near the green dot labeled 'Pasadena' ~

Rockin' the Colonies tour

Rockin' the Colonies tour ~ The Alarm, the Fixx and The English Beat.

One long weekend, three awesome shows and me!

07.24.08 ~ Thursday night at the Fonda Theater, Hollywood CA

07.25.08 ~ Friday night at the Sunset Station Casino, Las Vegas/Henderson NV

07.27.08 ~ Sunday night at the House of Blues, Anaheim CA

The Alarm was pure, no holds barred, ear-splitting rock music from the second they stepped on stage. The band has great energy, Mike Peters is amazing. Since battling back from leukemia TWICE, the older Alarm songs have taken on a new layer, a new meaning. Their new songs from Guerilla Tactics are about Mike Peters' leukemia fights.

The Fixx were amazing as well. The first night, I actually left the room; I just wasn't feeling it at all. My loss. The Fixx are stellar musicians - Jamie West Oram rips that guitar like nobody's business. Cy Curnin, the lead singer...charismatic, fascinating to watch. I was truly fixated (no pun intended) by his movements and mannerisms...damn.

The English Beat - what can I say? My favorite band. Some of my favorite people are in this band. As many times as I've seen them, last night's show in Anaheim ranks up there as one of my favorites - the energy, the crowd, the feeling I had during the show - it was all good.

Below are some of my favorite photos of the weekend. The rest can be seen at flickr.com

Dave Wakeling ~ the English Beat 07.24.08

the Alarm ~ 07.24.08

Cy Curnin, the Fixx ~ sharing the love

Saved by Zero ~ the Fixx

No cameras allowed?! House of Blues indeed

how I saw most of the English Beat's set in Vegas...

Mike Peters of the Alarm

*Rewind* Little Surfer Girl

Originally posted May 2007
This is how I spent my 40th birthday - in Hawaii, learning how to surf, with firemen. Yep.
Enjoy :)

A girl's gotta look the part

Wednesday night I was all a-flutter. Thursday was my surf lesson with the firemen and the news announced a storm moving in. Now, a typical Hawaiian storm ain't so bad. Y'know, it rains for 15 minutes, then *POOF* - all gone. But the words "wind" and "high surf" really were not the words I wanted to hear before surfing.

Thursday arrived. I took a peek out to the ocean from the room and boy, was the surf rollin'! White caps indicating rough-ish water. Although there were tons of surfers out there, as a novice, I was still a-flutter. Oh well, what's a girl to do? Go find firemen, of course.

I had to meet the pick-up van at 7:10 a.m. at the Sheraton/Royal Hawaiian on Don Ho Lane - a 3-minute walk from the Outrigger. I could not sit still...pacing...fretting...pacing...almost to the point of panic, until I saw the huge HAWAIIAN FIRE logo drive by. EEEK! I was really excited to see a van?! Jimmy the Driver made a couple of stops, filling the van with 12 anxious would-be surfers (3 Japanese students, 2 girls from Canada, a local, a family of 5 from Nebraska and me). We were a bit chatty, moreso along the lines of 'courtesy' chat, really. Then Jimmy the Driver kicked in with background info, where we were going, sights along the way.

30 minutes later, we arrived at this gorgeous beach. As we drove in, someone commented "Oh, you can camp here?" Jimmy the Driver laughed, "It's a camp alright." A lot of homeless people had set-up 'camp' on the beach. Anyway, the beach is on property which was formerly a military base. De-activated in 1999, Hawaiian Fire has found it to be the best place to teach surfing. The beach was set with two tents, lots of beach chairs and a bunch of surfboards. The wind was really blowing and the surf looked huge and intimidating. The water was a gorgeous blue and I was happy just taking that all in.

We were given shoes & rash protectors (a long-sleeved top) to put on, then sent to a tent for instruction. Enter Instructor Duke. Uhh...hi! He gave us some background info on HF, the gear we had on, the beach (the whole military story) and the weather ("Perfect surf weather! The waves are great!). Then, another guy came over. He told us how to position ourselves on the board, how & where are feet should be, how to paddle, that the paddling out was the hardest part, how to push up & get through a wave that breaks in front of you, and then how to pop-up when it's time to ride. Lemme tell ya, it looked soooo easy when he was showing us! He gave us the instructions: paddle out to a surfer, when he tells you to paddle, do it, he'll push you, you paddle 3-4 more strokes, then jump up and surf! Uhh...okay. So, we moved to the surfboards. Instructor Kevin (uh...hi!) had us position ourselves and show him how we pop-up onto the boards. I did pretty well. On dry land. Then we were set free, into the ocean.

One by one, Instructor Ryan (uhh...hi!) set us on our boards and pushed us off to the instructors out there 100 yards and waiting. Ryan said the surf was only 2-3 footers, perfect for beginners. I started paddling out. Damn, that's tiring! I got through the breakers crashing in my face and made it out to Kevin. Wait. Wait. "Ready, Reese? Paddle now! Paddle now!" I did! I jumped to my feet! I fell. OK. I got an hour and 20 minutes of this - I'll stand. So, paddle...paddle...cough, cough. Back out to Kevin. He gave me encouragment and advice ~ "Just pop-up to your feet!" Umm...yeah, okay. Wait. Wait. "Ready, Reese? Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!" I did! I jumped to my feet! I fell. I tried 2 more times. I got an hour and 10 minutes of this?! I rode back to the shore and sat for a few minutes. I was totally winded. I was totally disheartened. So, I sat there watching a 7 and 12 year-old surfing. Ohh, to be 12 and have no fear. (And have flexibility!) Grabbing my board, I went back into the water. Ryan, bless his heart, surfed in and pulled me out to the starting point. I sat through about 4 or 5 waves, then he turned me around and said "Go!" And I did! I paddled! I jumped to my feet! And was able to stand for a brief shining moment! And, when I say brief, I mean brief. It was fantastic! That was the only time I was able to get up on the board. I had a great time! Until I got back to the hotel.

Dude - my knee was totally jacked. My arms and shoulders were so sore. I sat in the jacuzzi for hours. I was far less sore when I started working out with my trainer! This was totally different. I'm still sore now.

I went to the Hawaiian Fire store to pick up my pictures and Ryan was there. "Hey, Rissa. Do your arms hurt today?" Hardy har har, bastard. :) He wished me a happy birthday, gave me some stickers and I left.

I highly recommend the surfing lessons ~ great fun, great pain.

Do you see what I see?

Off the 134 in Burbank sit two relatively new buildings called Pinnacle I and Pinnacle II. Pinnacle I houses Warner Music Group (Rhino, Atlantic, etc); they take full advantage of the building to promote its artists.

My friend Bo works across the freeway from Pinnacle I, her window offering her huge views of the latest CD by the artist du jour. A few months ago, it was Madonna and her 'Hard Candy' release. Poor Bo ~ she had a view of Madonna's crotch. Right there out her window.

After seeing the photo below and reading these comments, I don't feel so sorry for Bo anymore...

I gotta get up and back 'cause I've been off track

Yesterday, I copped to my struggles. Those feelings of shame and embarrassment didn't dissipate after all; just conveniently tucked away until I can handle it or choose to do something.

While reading the blog love I received for the 143rd time again, a post title caught my attention - What Fung Shui Has to Say About Clutter . Of course, I read it. Of course, my clutter is on a much grander scale (hey - go big or go home). However, part of my current struggle has to do with the little things - the mail that piles up on the corner of my desk, the shoes I wear most often pushed to the side, the clothes. Ai yi yi, the clothes!

After reading that post, I called The Wineau.

"Dude, I need your help. Again."
"When?"

This time, we are going to tackle it all; everything. It can't stay like this. I can't stay like this.

Not sure that one step at a time is the right approach for me because I think about too much. When Regi and her crew of 2 came in, I didn't have time to truly consider stuff - Wham bam thank you ma'am! In order to minimize shame, plow through it; get it done!

Back on track...

Gimme some lovin' (gimme gimme some lovin')

Email from Lys this a.m. ~

Congrats! Your rant re: work appr. clothing made Fabulously Broke's link love section :)

Huh?

So, I google'd 'fabulously broke' (God bless google!) and found this great blog. I'm reading, I'm reading, I'm reading and then WHAM! (homage to XXX and J) there it is - blog love! I got blog love!

*I* got blog love! Many thanks to FB for the blog love. That really made my day :)

struggling

Got a call from @illuminato this evening - so great to talk with her!

During our conversation, she mentioned her mom is a hoarder, too. She has been following @illuminato on Twitter, reading her tweets and such. By reading those, she discovered my clutter problem and expressed to @illuminato how proud she is of me. That made my heart swell and brought tears to my eyes.

I'm struggling, people. I am struggling. As hell-bent as I am to keep my living space clutter-free, it is hard. Friends don't understand - "just clean it!" is what I've been told more than once. And, while I am super conscious of some things; not so much so with others. It's hard and I do not know what to do. I'm frustrated and scattered; having trouble focusing on the task(s) at hand. I'm having trouble throwing things out...trouble organizing, putting things in their place...hell, trouble putting things in *a* place.

Why this is difficult for me is puzzling. I don't get it! Which adds to my frustration; so much so that I end up crying, giving up. That's when I fall back on what I know - avoidance. Fill my nights and weekends with people and things - have to do *this* with *them* so *that* will have to wait until next time. I've also noticed some not-so-good behaviors which have me concerned...

I need help again. I need help to finish the job. I have to ask for that help.

I will.

This is how we do it!

$155.34M $158M ~ opening weekend!

~ Thank you! ~

Really busy, busy, busy...

First, go see The Dark Knight.

Then, while you're at the mall, hit the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale.

I was online at 11:43 p.m. last night, shopping.
I tried to get out of the house at 7 a.m. to hit Topanga, to shop.
Going to Santa Anita with the boss at lunchtime, to shop.

The Nordstrom Anniversary sale is serious business, people.

Clearly, cobalt is the new black.
I shall rock this dress in a most splendid way!

Say "Hello!" to my new favorite jacket in my new favorite color!

I will be rockin' this Donna Ricco dress

And look at the darling Franco Sarto shoes in my size!

I'll be stylin' and profilin' come the Fall!

07/18/08

**Shameless Plug Alert! Shameless Plug Alert!**

Friday, July 18, 2008 marks the opening of The Dark Knight.
It's brilliant, disturbing, funny, dark and fucking fantastic!

Yes, it's one of my movies; and I normally don't do the shameless plug thing.

For this movie? Hell, yeah I am!

See it.

No - see it in IMAX!
You're welcome.

I get the time too often on AM radio...

Very tired; can't sleep. Mind is racing ~ random, warm, strange and lovely thoughts are bouncing around en mi cabeza. So much so that my delicious new bed isn't even helping. Neither is Stella.

One of the tricks to sleeping is to do something mindless. Thanks to beatgirl for this survey:

Hello my name is:
Rissa

Who was the last person who held your hand?
Bo

Have you kissed someone with braces?
Nope - not even in jr. high

If you could change your eye color what would it be?
I wouldn't. Although, I did seriously consider getting blue contacts. Then I saw my brother with some and decided it was too 'Children of the Corn' for me.

Is there someone you can't stop thinking about?
Indeed

Whens the last time you cried?
July 5, 2008

When was the last time you hugged someone?
This afternoon :)

Who was the last person that made you laugh?
the Princess

How many 20 dollar bills do you have on you right now?
On me? Like I stick 'em there or something...the answer is zero

Where did you last go out to eat?
Huntington Library and Fosselman's

Do you dance in the car?
Heck yeah! Well, as much as one can dance in the car

How did you get your last bruise?
I am not sure; probably my desk at work

What makes you lose your appetite?
Eating

What's your favorite season?
Most definitely the fall

Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
Yes I do

What is the last movie you saw in a theater?
The Dark Knight

What do you think of people who have their name tattooed on them?
I think their names are probably written in their underwear, too

Ever found more than a dollar in a random place?
Yes, I have

When a friend walks out of your life, do you go after them or let them go?
The last time, I let the 3 of them go

Would it hurt seeing someone make out with the last person you kissed?
No

Did you speak to your father today?
I didn't

How many months until your birthday?
10

What are you listening to?
the fan and Riley snoring

What color is your hair?
black, faded red and grey

What's bothering you right now?
Insomnia.

Are you happy?
Overall, yes I am ~ the happiest I've been in a while.

Do you miss someone?
different people for different reasons

Do you think you can last in a relationship for three months?
absolutely

How good is Coca-Cola?
When it hits the spot, it's gooood

When was the last time you cleaned your room?
I tackled some of it earlier this evening

How did you wake up this morning?
well-rested

What's the last bone you broke?
My arm in the 4th grade

What are you excited about?
Lots of things - Wednesday, PC, Rockin the Colonies with Joe, Vegas with the Wineau and the Princess, sleeping and love

Do you have any tattoos or piercings?
I do

Do you drink bottled water?
Yes indeed

What's something(s) you wish you could understand better?
Where the sense of entitlement comes from in some of our employees; why people can't put the effing blackberry and/or cell phone down during meals.

What are you doing tonight?
not sure

Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now?
Well now *that* doesn't sound too bad...

alright maybe gonna find him today...

Love hasn't been in my cards for a while; guess that's okay since I haven't been in a place to accept Love for a while.

After some strange happenings the past several weeks, it's quite possible Love is on its way.

Former lovers, crushes and other dalliances have crossed my path in some way or another; I've met two very charming guys and have engaged in some serious flirtation with a third (ohh how fun!); met a guy recently who's caught my attention. Guess I'm just a little more aware, a little more open to Love.

Pretty excited to see what's coming my way...it's about time I get a brand new lover...

...and you gotta look sharp...

The Company I work for follows a 'business casual' dress-code for employees. Working in HR, I've seen the limits of this pushed to the extreme. And now that summer is upon us, there are no limits. WTC are people thinking?!

The other day I saw a gal in the building wearing a maxi dress (long, flowy, halter style dress that has no shape), flip-flops and hair piled atop her head as if she didn't have time to slide a comb or brush through it. I was appalled!

I've seen a couple of employees wearing short-shorts. Uh...hellooo: pinstripes on short-shorts do not make them 'business' attire.

I've seen sweatpants at work. I've seen jeans with holes at work. I've seen extreme casual wear at work. And I am seriously appalled.

Most of the time, I wear jeans to work. However, the jeans I wear are not in a state of total disrepair. I take some pride in what I wear; and subscribe to the "Dress for the job you want" philosophy.

Many days I just shake my head. Some days I want to breakout the annual 'Summer dress code' memo and hand-deliver to each employee.

Sigh.

I don't get it.

*WTC = What The Crap

...knowing you can always count on me, for sure...

Here's to TheGirls ~ G, Suz, Sheri, P & me ~ and our 4 Wineries and a Wedding weekend in Santa Barbara.

@ the Santa Barbara Zoo

sharing the love at the wedding
dancing divas @ the reception
our last morning in Santa Barbara
the Wineaux @ Curtis Winery
@ Curtis Winery, Los Olivos CA
sunset @ Casa de Jones
@ the zoo
TheGirls!

Even though I try, I can't let go...

So...been thinkin'...my bed cost $1,000 - right? It hasn't been delivered yet...I could *totally* return the bed and get The Purse!

And, best of all, save some money.

This is totally doable.

I'm obsessed.